America has elected a new leader, Santa Claus has been and gone (socks and jam making equipment in case you were wondering), the world has gone bust and STILL nobody has scored against Edwin Van der Sar (the previous record being held by the wonderfully named Steve Death).

To be fair, were United to play an Everton team minus any recognised strikers every week then the Dutchman's new defensive record is one a comatose you or a hugely-relaxed me sleeping it off between the Old Trafford posts would comfortably surpass in time.

So big respect for this quite remarkable defensive feat but in light of the fact Van der Sar was essentially a handsomly-rewarded spectator during Saturday's match we had better give this week's goalie's jersey to&.